Reality is beginning to set in

As weekends with extended family go, this last weekend was one the best we spent with family. The long weekend had enough time  that we didn't feel rushed.  It was spent reconnecting with family  that live far away, enjoying nieces and nephews and dreaming of Rwanda.  When the time our family to depart,everything went smoothly. To our shock, the doorbell rang 20 minutes later and my sister in law stood there, tears in her eyes, having come back for one last hug.  That's when it hit me--these moments we automatically take for granted were now numbered.  The remaining visits we could have before leaving Rwanda could very easily be counted on one hand. . .

Suitcases are being filled and the visas came back approved today.  One month until we fly. . .until our life could be radically changed.  I am finding I no longer lay awake at night mulling over the details of what needs to be done.  God has been giving me wisdom and grace to know what to do each day.  I still don't sleep quickly, however, as I am now pondering the incredible possibilities in front of us.  I see dreams, passions and excitement rising up in my children and I sense a calm and steadiness in a much deeper  level in my husband. Something is happening within my family . . .and it is good!

Reality is beginning to sink in, it could be the last dance recital, preschool grad, camp adventure . . for quite some time.  While the prospect of missing life carrying on here is very real, there is the adventure and curiosity about what could be in store just around the bend for us.  Goodbyes become more meaningful, friendships more precious, activities, culture, and day to day living are recognized more as privileges and less as rights.  I find myself truly seeking out what holds the most value--both in possessions and time. As I sort, give away and ponder, I can be easy to fall into regrets of "if only's" (if I let myself).  Overall, though, it's the packing up of one life and opening up the possibility of something completely different.  Faith, trust, sacrifice, surrender and total reliance on God have taken on new meanings as we step forward in a brand new direction. 

The best is yet to come!