So What's the Point?

My husband came home from a meeting with an alarming stat of how many children, raised in a Christian home, decide to not attend church once they reach adulthood. It's something I've seen, but until now (where my teens are fast approaching adulthood), I really didn't pay attention. This poses a much deeper question of why we do what we do, are we simply "Going through the motions" as the Matthew West song says? What makes the difference? I believe it's a sense of purpose . . . But ask me again in 20 years:)

So often I have seen, heard and asked "what's the point?". Purpose. It's been said that if you aim for nothing, that is what you will get. This is so true in life, both in long term and short term goals . . .even with hopes, dreams, parenting, etc. Like so many other lessons in life, I can tie this back to our trip to Mexico. Our purpose in setting up chairs for 3 years was our mission's fund, our purpose for the trip to Mexico was to get our thoughts and focus off of ourselves and onto the needs of others. Our ultimate goal was accomplished and we've come home with a renewed focus.

In saying that, however, I am not portraying that we "have it all together". . .I have so much growing to do and our family is no where near perfection.

Since I started homeschooling,10 years ago, my goal has been to always instill in my kids a sense of purpose for them and their lives. This can be exemplified through their curriculum, activities and even their free time passions. I've had to recognize that each of them are different and allow them to be free to be who they have been called to be. Now, as I have 3 teens, I see different giftings rise up in them.

I cannot control their future choices, I have to trust that the seeds planted will bear fruit in the right season. I can, however, present opportunities for them to recognize that they have gifts and strengths to offer others, and, my husband and I need to lead by example by demonstrating that we have gifts and strengths to offer those around us. We can serve wholeheartedly, love wholeheartedly, and believe that God will direct us to where we can make a difference.

God says that when you seek Him with your whole heart, you will find Him--don't be afraid to seek Him for His purpose for you!

Walk by Faith, not in fear

Well, it's the new year, and I have to say that I am very glad to be in 2013.  Christmas this year was challenging . . . and not in the way I thought it would be.  I was expecting to have a hard time adjusting back to the general greed that is associated with the season of "giving and getting", that proved to be a huge weight taken off the shoulders of our entire family.  The challenge came in other ways.

From December 14th on, our oldest was very sick.  At first it looked to be a bad case of the flu (diagnosed as Influenza A), when he took a turn for the worse, we took him to the ER.  First guess was the flu, however tests revealed further problems.  Nathan's liver was inflammed.  There was concern for his other organs, so he was watched carefully to see if surgery was required.  Thankfully, we got to share Christmas night with him at home.  He was thin, weak and exhausted, but home.  When he returned to the hospital 2 days later (poor guy, on his 16th birthday), he was starting to look more like himself.  That's when I got the phone call . . . "hepatitis A" was the diagnosis, most likely from Mexico . . . guilt, fear and condemnation engulfed me as I tried to wrap my mind around the diagnosis. 

Before our trip, I was praying about whether or not to get the Hep A immunization . . . and honestly, I didn`t feel the need.  I had a peace about it.  After Nathan came down sick, I found myself questioning God and condeming myself.  Then, the panic set in.  This is highly contagious--though no one else in the family (or the team from Mexico) ever got sick or showed any symptoms.  However, we had been hosting people from the moment we returned home.  I needed to contact everyone who came to our home during a certain time frame (wow, talk about humbling).  I felt guilty, ashamed, crushed and scared to open my home again. 

Our family was quickly immunized against both the flu and hep A.  Further research with the health unit had us questioning whether Nathan really did pick up the virus in Mexico, the conclusion was more likely he picked it up on the trip home through some sort of deli sandwhich--at least that`s our best guess (we will never know for certain).

On January 3, we took Nathan back for further tests and he was given a positive doctor`s report--no lingering side effects, he just needed to gain back the 17 lbs he lost (he had already gained back 12 lbs in 6 days, so no problem).  He`s completely back to normal now, with no worried of being contagious.  We are settling into routine and planning and saving for a return trip to Mexico (fully vaccinated for Hep A next time).  I have had to face my fears and open our home for guests--though the families we had over were already vaccinated. 

I know there is nothing to fear, I know there is nothing to worry about, I know that God is bigger, but it has been an exercise of faith over fear for me, deep in my heart. 

So where do I go from here? Forward, with no looking back.  I choose to walk without fear, I will choose to be obedient when God asks me to step out and I will be obedient no matter what.