Well, it's day 2. In my time with God, I was reminded that all of creation speaks of a Creator who loves order. If the Creator of the universe can give this world such order and precision, then certainly He can give me the wisdom and insight I need to have order and organization in my home of 7!
I am reminded of a drawer that is filled with clutter, things just scattered and tossed in there. When one takes everything out, sorts it and straightens it, the drawer will be able to close easily. It doesn't mean anything was necessarily thrown away, but rather sorted into where it belongs. So it is with my life. My desire is to carefully weigh both what I do with my time and space and decide carefully what needs to fill my life.
We are step-by-step going through the house and decluttering. As the excess is removed, there is a sense of liberation and freedom. Contentment and joy are not linked to what possessions we have, but rather, they come to us from God. It is only after I seek His face that I am filled with all I need.
Today I am challenging the kids to carve out their own time with God, to seek Him and draw on Him as their source. If they can grasp this concept at a young age . . . what a walk!
an ordinary family who just wants to do what God wants
Friday, June 18, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Summer of Surrender
Another year of school is now done, books are being packed away and the kids are excited for a couple of months free from bookwork. Hmm, what to do now? In some ways it feels like we just push through those last few days or weeks, forgetting about finishing with excellence, but rather just trying to be done. In those crunch times, it can feel like life falls apart, the house falls into disarray, laundry gets backed up, meal planning goes out the window and scheduling falls by the wayside. Now, let's not even begin to look at my personal life, devotions? not happening (unless you count those few minutes hiding in the bathroom), working out? uhh, pacing the floor in an effort to get a teething toddler back to sleep doesn't count, does it? completing my online courses? well, when I am in the van travelling, I do listen to them . . . until the laptop battery runs out. I think it's time to surrender (again).
So, where do I start? I really thing for me it comes with establishing a new routine while we are in-between school years. And, of course, I will need to take baby steps in order make sure this new pattern sticks (proving you CAN teach an old dog new tricks).
Today is step one: Have a devotional time
I will hide from the kids for 15 minutes and just get
in touch with my Saviour.
When it comes to surrender, I usually am all for it. I can turn over my hopes, dreams, tears and frustrations to one who loves me, cares for me, knows me and accepts me for who I am. In the end, who will benefit? My whole family.
So, where do I start? I really thing for me it comes with establishing a new routine while we are in-between school years. And, of course, I will need to take baby steps in order make sure this new pattern sticks (proving you CAN teach an old dog new tricks).
Today is step one: Have a devotional time
I will hide from the kids for 15 minutes and just get
in touch with my Saviour.
When it comes to surrender, I usually am all for it. I can turn over my hopes, dreams, tears and frustrations to one who loves me, cares for me, knows me and accepts me for who I am. In the end, who will benefit? My whole family.
Monday, May 3, 2010
achieving mommyhoood
I always wanted to be a mom—right from the time I was little, my life’s ambition was to mother children. My dreams did not diminish as I grew up, even with a diagnosis that I would never have kids. If I couldn’t give birth to children, I would adopt—after all, I was adopted and knew how wonderful that could be. To this day, I will never forget the day I found out that my dreams were coming true. Ahh, the wonder of motherhood . . .
Three kids in three years did not diminish my joy of being a mom, but somewhere in that timeframe, I found myself searching for significance beyond my calling as “mother”. Before kids, even though I did not hold down a “paying” job, I volunteered most weeks and found myself helping direct TV shows, write children’s programs and help coordinate guests for a TV station. After kids came, my job description shifted, but I still had the desire to do something “important”.
For awhile, I tried to be a supermom. I held down a part-time job looking after our church’s preschool department, coordinated a mom’s group, and led a kids club. My two oldest were at school and kindergarten and I was enjoying the busyness of making an impact. The bubble burst soon after with a job shift that brought me into reluctantly homeschooling. I still carried on with many of the activities, but yearned to make a difference. In the end, the only difference I made was being more stressed out and short with my kids because I was not at peace with myself or what I was called to do.
Now don’t get me wrong. I love my kids and my family, but I was measuring my accomplishments with the wrong measuring stick. I had forgotten that my first calling was to pour into my own children and not yearn for the day when they are older and I would be freed to do something that holds significant value.
I don’t know when the turning point came. Maybe it was when I realized that the “when the kids get older” was coming to pass as my oldest now looks me in the eye . . . and is now looking at grade nine courses (gulp). While my youngest is only beginning to walk, I know how fast that time will go. For my oldest, the mould is setting I can only hope and pray that the seeds I’ve planted in their lives are the right ones.
Not long ago, I was meeting with my son’s preschool teacher. She commented that since I was so good with kids, I should consider going through for a teacher. In the past, I’d say that was my future plan once the kids were older, but not this time. Instead, I smiled and thanked her, but said that teaching was exactly what I was doing, and my best and favourite students were my children. As I said that, I realized that at last I’ve come into a place of peace and joy in mothering my children. I rejoice with the stage that I am at because I am exactly where I am meant to be.
I am not saying all to criticize mothers who work, or have dreams or future ambitions. On the contrary, I applaud you. While I have many hopes and dreams and future goals, I am choosing not to focus only on them. I am finding that when you continually wish for the next stage to come (“baby to sleep through night”, “potty-training”, “reading”, “working independently”, etc), we can miss enjoying the stage that we are at. Even in the worst of times with my little ones not sleeping through the night, there was something soothing about that warm little baby snuggled close in your arms as you sit and rock in the middle of the night. There comes a time where those stages, both pleasant and trying, will come to an end. So, no matter where you are, please try to find some nuggets to enjoy, because it won’t be long until this stage is forever gone . . .
Three kids in three years did not diminish my joy of being a mom, but somewhere in that timeframe, I found myself searching for significance beyond my calling as “mother”. Before kids, even though I did not hold down a “paying” job, I volunteered most weeks and found myself helping direct TV shows, write children’s programs and help coordinate guests for a TV station. After kids came, my job description shifted, but I still had the desire to do something “important”.
For awhile, I tried to be a supermom. I held down a part-time job looking after our church’s preschool department, coordinated a mom’s group, and led a kids club. My two oldest were at school and kindergarten and I was enjoying the busyness of making an impact. The bubble burst soon after with a job shift that brought me into reluctantly homeschooling. I still carried on with many of the activities, but yearned to make a difference. In the end, the only difference I made was being more stressed out and short with my kids because I was not at peace with myself or what I was called to do.
Now don’t get me wrong. I love my kids and my family, but I was measuring my accomplishments with the wrong measuring stick. I had forgotten that my first calling was to pour into my own children and not yearn for the day when they are older and I would be freed to do something that holds significant value.
I don’t know when the turning point came. Maybe it was when I realized that the “when the kids get older” was coming to pass as my oldest now looks me in the eye . . . and is now looking at grade nine courses (gulp). While my youngest is only beginning to walk, I know how fast that time will go. For my oldest, the mould is setting I can only hope and pray that the seeds I’ve planted in their lives are the right ones.
Not long ago, I was meeting with my son’s preschool teacher. She commented that since I was so good with kids, I should consider going through for a teacher. In the past, I’d say that was my future plan once the kids were older, but not this time. Instead, I smiled and thanked her, but said that teaching was exactly what I was doing, and my best and favourite students were my children. As I said that, I realized that at last I’ve come into a place of peace and joy in mothering my children. I rejoice with the stage that I am at because I am exactly where I am meant to be.
I am not saying all to criticize mothers who work, or have dreams or future ambitions. On the contrary, I applaud you. While I have many hopes and dreams and future goals, I am choosing not to focus only on them. I am finding that when you continually wish for the next stage to come (“baby to sleep through night”, “potty-training”, “reading”, “working independently”, etc), we can miss enjoying the stage that we are at. Even in the worst of times with my little ones not sleeping through the night, there was something soothing about that warm little baby snuggled close in your arms as you sit and rock in the middle of the night. There comes a time where those stages, both pleasant and trying, will come to an end. So, no matter where you are, please try to find some nuggets to enjoy, because it won’t be long until this stage is forever gone . . .
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Love in our home
February is known as the month of love. February is also a special month for me, because it was in this month many years ago, that my husband and I began dating. Wow, that was a long time ago! I am not big on “buying into” the commercialism of the holidays, but I do appreciate the thought behind some of the holidays. For example, to celebrate Valentine’s Day, you consider the many reasons why you love somebody. Shouldn’t we do this year round?
This can be challenging. When we homeschool, the line between educator and mom gets blurred. We’ve probably all seen those TV commercials where the child gets home from school after having a rough day and the mom gives him freshly baked cookies and everything’s okay. This scenario just does not exist when you homeschool! As teachers, we are not always popular with our children. They don’t have mom to run to when there’s too much schoolwork to do.
Now don’t get me wrong, we do have those wonderful moments of connecting heart-to-heart with our kids. Words cannot describe that wonderful fuzzy feeling you get as you cuddle next to your child on the couch and they successfully read that first book to you. You cannot bottle that feeling when your preteen suddenly grasps that math concept and you see their face light up with understanding. These are bonding moments with your child.
As a mom of 5, I can get so focused on teaching that I forget about mothering. My daughter (rather bluntly) reminded me of that, about a year ago. Since then, I have been trying add special treats into our homeschooling life to demonstrate my love to my children. I want my children to both know they are loved (security) and feel that they are loved (demonstrated).
Perhaps the best way to explain this concept is to go to the “love chapter” in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (paraphrased). Let me put this passage into homeschooling terms.
Love is patient and kind—even when I am explaining the same concept dozens of times a day. I will not overreact when my children do. I will respond to them in kind and gentle words.
Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude—I choose not to compare myself to other homeschooling moms (ouch!), I accept that my children are unique individuals who learn at their own speed. I will not get caught comparing or bragging about my children (at the expense of others). I will not put unhealthy pressure on them—to “keep up or else . . . summer school”.
Love does not demand its own way—I will not force my beliefs on other moms, or look down on them when they choose to educate their children differently than I do.
Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of wrongs . . . love rejoices with truth—I will not let
my emotions determine what kind of days my children will have. I will choose to forget about
yesterday’s mistakes and celebrate today’s triumphs.
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance—I will not give up on my kids, I know that they will succeed and I will cheer them on and support them through school and on into adulthood.
Oh boy, even I just reread and paraphrased this scripture passage; I realize that I have a long ways to go. I do not want homeschooling to negatively affect my relationship with my children. I want my kids to have good memories of their time at home.
Awhile ago, I bought each of my children a “love box”. This little wooden box (from the dollar store) guaranteed my children a chance to be heard. Whenever they desire, they can write a note for me. I will always write back to them. When I write back, I focus on their strengths and all that I appreciate about them. I am finding that my kids are expressing their feelings more and more to me.
Another thing my husband and I do is take our children on dates. The kids look forward to these one-on-one times with mom or dad. Sometimes we go out for ice-cream or for a bike ride or even go look at hockey cards. The kids help decide and we just enjoy time together.
Last year we brought in the first ever “Wilson Children’s Day” on May 1st. The kids love their own “holiday”. On that day, we try to do something fun and out of our usual routine.
We also try to celebrate the little things. I try to bring out the china and set the table nice with a special tablecloth and candles on days that we’ve had small triumphs—a perfect score on a spelling test, mastering a new math concept, losing that first tooth—I can see by my children’s reactions that they feel treasured. Now we have a “Celebrate Plate” that someone can get at the supper meal to acknowledge that special accomplishment.
A book that has really helped me understand my children is The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell. We all communicate love in different ways and our children are no different. A quick key for figuring out your child’s “love language”, watch how they express love. Love can be communicated through:
1. Physical touch—cuddles or wrestling, when your kids are “touchy feely”.
2. Words of Affirmation—encouraging words make them shine and harsh words are devastating to them.
3. Quality Time—any time spent together is meaningful; they just want to be with you.
4. Gifts—they treasure any and all gift, it doesn’t matter how big or small.
5. Acts of Service—your child truly appreciates it when you help them, they are usually quick to help you, too.
I hope that you are able to share love not just this month, but easily through the year! Happy Valentine’s Day from Renae!
This can be challenging. When we homeschool, the line between educator and mom gets blurred. We’ve probably all seen those TV commercials where the child gets home from school after having a rough day and the mom gives him freshly baked cookies and everything’s okay. This scenario just does not exist when you homeschool! As teachers, we are not always popular with our children. They don’t have mom to run to when there’s too much schoolwork to do.
Now don’t get me wrong, we do have those wonderful moments of connecting heart-to-heart with our kids. Words cannot describe that wonderful fuzzy feeling you get as you cuddle next to your child on the couch and they successfully read that first book to you. You cannot bottle that feeling when your preteen suddenly grasps that math concept and you see their face light up with understanding. These are bonding moments with your child.
As a mom of 5, I can get so focused on teaching that I forget about mothering. My daughter (rather bluntly) reminded me of that, about a year ago. Since then, I have been trying add special treats into our homeschooling life to demonstrate my love to my children. I want my children to both know they are loved (security) and feel that they are loved (demonstrated).
Perhaps the best way to explain this concept is to go to the “love chapter” in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (paraphrased). Let me put this passage into homeschooling terms.
Love is patient and kind—even when I am explaining the same concept dozens of times a day. I will not overreact when my children do. I will respond to them in kind and gentle words.
Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude—I choose not to compare myself to other homeschooling moms (ouch!), I accept that my children are unique individuals who learn at their own speed. I will not get caught comparing or bragging about my children (at the expense of others). I will not put unhealthy pressure on them—to “keep up or else . . . summer school”.
Love does not demand its own way—I will not force my beliefs on other moms, or look down on them when they choose to educate their children differently than I do.
Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of wrongs . . . love rejoices with truth—I will not let
my emotions determine what kind of days my children will have. I will choose to forget about
yesterday’s mistakes and celebrate today’s triumphs.
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance—I will not give up on my kids, I know that they will succeed and I will cheer them on and support them through school and on into adulthood.
Oh boy, even I just reread and paraphrased this scripture passage; I realize that I have a long ways to go. I do not want homeschooling to negatively affect my relationship with my children. I want my kids to have good memories of their time at home.
Awhile ago, I bought each of my children a “love box”. This little wooden box (from the dollar store) guaranteed my children a chance to be heard. Whenever they desire, they can write a note for me. I will always write back to them. When I write back, I focus on their strengths and all that I appreciate about them. I am finding that my kids are expressing their feelings more and more to me.
Another thing my husband and I do is take our children on dates. The kids look forward to these one-on-one times with mom or dad. Sometimes we go out for ice-cream or for a bike ride or even go look at hockey cards. The kids help decide and we just enjoy time together.
Last year we brought in the first ever “Wilson Children’s Day” on May 1st. The kids love their own “holiday”. On that day, we try to do something fun and out of our usual routine.
We also try to celebrate the little things. I try to bring out the china and set the table nice with a special tablecloth and candles on days that we’ve had small triumphs—a perfect score on a spelling test, mastering a new math concept, losing that first tooth—I can see by my children’s reactions that they feel treasured. Now we have a “Celebrate Plate” that someone can get at the supper meal to acknowledge that special accomplishment.
A book that has really helped me understand my children is The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell. We all communicate love in different ways and our children are no different. A quick key for figuring out your child’s “love language”, watch how they express love. Love can be communicated through:
1. Physical touch—cuddles or wrestling, when your kids are “touchy feely”.
2. Words of Affirmation—encouraging words make them shine and harsh words are devastating to them.
3. Quality Time—any time spent together is meaningful; they just want to be with you.
4. Gifts—they treasure any and all gift, it doesn’t matter how big or small.
5. Acts of Service—your child truly appreciates it when you help them, they are usually quick to help you, too.
I hope that you are able to share love not just this month, but easily through the year! Happy Valentine’s Day from Renae!
Thursday, January 14, 2010
lessons in prayer
My desire has been to instill Godly principles in the hearts and lives of my children. All too often, I feel I just don't do a good job. Life can get in the way, I am up with the baby, kids are grumpy, the dog and cat made a mess on the carpet . . . some days, heart training seems so hard to even consider when we are trying to just get through the basics.
However, there are days when I see a glimmer of those prayers and heart lessons. . . like this past week. When our family received word that a friend had passed away, my children demonstrated what was in their heart--their first reaction was to pray! The kids are getting into the habit more and more of dropping what they are doing and following God's prompting to prayer. Even our 3-year-old is offering his prayers, including thanking God for the food (whether it is mealtime or not)!
What does this show me? My kids are seeing that while I cannot provide all they need, there is One who can. When we feel helpless in the situation, there is One who can meet that need. Above all, God is able. Oh to have this kind of child-like faith, one that trusts, hopes, believes, and surrenders completely!
I loves the lessons my children demonstrate in their day to day walk.
However, there are days when I see a glimmer of those prayers and heart lessons. . . like this past week. When our family received word that a friend had passed away, my children demonstrated what was in their heart--their first reaction was to pray! The kids are getting into the habit more and more of dropping what they are doing and following God's prompting to prayer. Even our 3-year-old is offering his prayers, including thanking God for the food (whether it is mealtime or not)!
What does this show me? My kids are seeing that while I cannot provide all they need, there is One who can. When we feel helpless in the situation, there is One who can meet that need. Above all, God is able. Oh to have this kind of child-like faith, one that trusts, hopes, believes, and surrenders completely!
I loves the lessons my children demonstrate in their day to day walk.
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